Smashwords Promo

From 3/3 though 3/9, Smashwords is having a site wide promo where you can put your books on sale.  Sacred Sin and The Maze are free.



Sacred Sin



THE MAZE

Photo Attribution:  blog.retrofitrepublic.com

A scrivener

I have been so down on this writing thing.  Many I know are giving up the epub thing and I am growing discouraged.  At least I was. 

Last night I practiced discipline in an undisciplined way.  I have heard: "Write, no matter what.  Save it erase it, fix it, just write."  So I did.  I typed so fast.  It is a disorderly mess.  But I am looking at this story in a way that seems new to me.  I want to get the people from this point to this point and I don't know how.  I never had that problem before.  But I don't sell much, so maybe my readers have a problem with how I was doing it.  Anyway, I wrote about what happened when they got there and I know I can put in the interim easily when I am ready.  Writing doesn't scare me.  Carrying out  a task does, I am guessing.  I am maybe just lazy.  Anyway I thought it was great fun and it raced along in getting on the page just as the part of the story was racing along.  It is full of typos, but that is easy to fix.  I think.

So just when I am all down on my self and my skills and thinking I am not posting, I have no ideas, I am in the doldrums, physical junk going on, family junk going on, weather weirdness, I just now looked and my "boring post" had ninety five hits. 

Don't anyone tell me what this is all about cuz you don't know.  It is all totally random.  That is final. 

Another Fabulous Freebie

I cannot say enough good things about Smashwords.  My book, THE MAZE,  is already in the Premium catalog.  The cover wouldn't take and I didn't like it anyway, so I did one in Powerpoint in about ten minutes and, though it is not my favorite, it is in keeping with several of the book's themes and doesn't look bad.  I wanted that little red head on there from the get go, but couldn't get her to fit.  She is a joyous me, someone I don't see too often.

A person was sorry they couldn't download cuz they had a Nook.  Anymore was in Select and will be for a few more weeks, so that is Amazon exclusive, a mixed bag, but  it will go on Smashwords too pretty soon.

Smashwords puts you in the Apple, Nook, Kobo, and all other devices format so you can even download to some off brand e reader you bought on vacation in Thailand.  I have always had my best sales from Barnes and Noble, so I hope this works out.  Hundreds have already been downloaded for free, and this book, which I love so much, I am doing the sequel, is in the cellar at Amazon.  So I hope y'all enjoy it.

http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/158247

Indie Publishing--an Analogy

(Loudly blowing horn. . .)

I'm an "Indie Publisher".  That covers a lot of ground:  self-published, Kindle, Smashwords, Indie Press and others.  It was a combination of impatience and snobbery that led me down that path.  I don't even fit the amorphous indie model.  I write street language, infidelity, God dropping in for an occasional remark or two.  But it's good.  It's light, fast, fun, irreverent, sexy and not dirty.  I don't think a good BJ scene has to be dirty, with a lot of slobbering,  romantic over-the-top description of the penis,  submissive behavior, and a bossy guy to be realistic or good or sexy.  I'm probably one of  a very few that can write a sexy BJ scene that is nice.  Lora Leigh's are f-ing scary.  Rate 'em.

And then when the rejection letters came filled with poor grammar, misspellings, missing words, (fill in the blank in their form letters where they could not bother to fill in the blank) and obvious signs that they never looked at the work, well, I love you, Betsy, but fuck 'em.

So a new track ball on the desktop pc, a new laptop, and an illness have kept me away from my creative endeavors and I have been watching movies. Last night I fell asleep watching Teeth which was about vagina dentata and sucked, which I realize is an oxymoron. But, when I woke, I was wide awake and it was quite late so I surfed Starz On Demand, and started to watch The Cleaner. Did you ever hear of it? I haven't.  Samuel L. Jackson, who has been in some turkeys, but was doing an excellent job of being Samuel L. Jackson, always his best role.  That beautifully aging fox, Ed Harris.  Complex plot. Little straggling octopus threads grabbing you right off.  Good subplot with Jackson's daughter, not thrown in, important, interesting. You know how in Transporter Jason Statham goes up to the wrought iron gate of the manse and it's what's her name --Amber Valletta?-- and it rates him a huge cardboard statue in the theater lobby?  Well, Jackson goes up to the wrought iron gate and it is Eva Mendez doing her usual wooden Barbie thing, but being very beautiful and just interesting to watch, but no cardboard statue for Jackson.  Alicia Silverstone as Jackson's office manager looking better than she ever did, (needed a little more of her acerbic commentary here).

So here's my point.  They have algorithms.  And Alvin and the Chipmunks gets the play, the licensing, the press. Pirates of the Caribbean--you see how much those fucking Legos cost.  Cleaner gets shit.  Probably went straight to Video.

I write The Cleaner of love stories.  Lora Leigh writes the Alvin and the Chipmunks or The Transporter of love stories. Harlequin Press has its algorithms, probably constructed by the same programmer that said Alvin and the Chipmunks would make millions.  I walked the walk.  Alvin didn't. We can't fit any agent's algorithm.  Too bad for them.  A couple of four star reviews by strangers that indicate they actually got what I was writing tell me I did good.  Maybe not for the fans of The Tortured Love of the Troubled Duke or Alvin, but good enough to appeal to the same people that surf for a good movie to watch--and occasionally find one. Maybe not great, but good.  And enjoyable.  I got more than 900 downloads from Barnes and Noble for my Lawman freebie and 21 of those people bothered to rate it so far, and some were four stars. I can still walk the walk. Pay attention to my name.

I am feeling waaay better, and I told you you were gonna get it.

Just Hanging Around, Waiting. . .

Anyone thinking about it, the free give away thing is a REALLY good idea.  27 downloads in 24 hours.  Too bad they don't BUY it at that rate.  Hopefully, someone will mention it to someone, etc. . .  But it has other side effects.  Besides a bump in blog hits, I actually had someone link to this site through Smashwords.  I was kind of thinking I was wasting my time there.  So now I am all fired up.

 THANKS EVERYBODY!!!

Whoops.

So, I was all set to do a huge rant on how you go on Amazon author boards and the grammar and spelling in their little self-promo posts is so awful.  (Are those different things?) And how can you expect me to buy your book if it is going to be that full of errors and that carelessly done, and then I noticed that in this morning's blog I misspelled loyalty.  So, pass the crow.

And FYI, if you see a typo, let me know.  Smashwords I can correct it in a jif.  Amazon not so easy, so if it is in the Amazon version, it might not get fixed.  At least not right away.  I am so obsessively focusing on this because certain other parts of my life that I probably could go right away and blab about cuz they probably cannot be bothered to read the blog of an inconsequential, invisible woman anyway, are just a huge suck fest.  You try to be dynamic and move forward and look at each day expectantly, like maybe there will be a pleasant surprise in store and isn't this fall weather amazing, but there are some things that are unchangeable and so completely out of your control that sneak in and piss all over the place, and, seriously, I am not talking about my dog this time.

PROMO

Just a  reminder.  My books are available at Amazon.com for Kindle and Kindle apps.  And Sacred Sin is also now available at Smashwords.  From my stats, I see that lots of you are stopping by to view my blog and I want to thank you all for your interest and your loyalty.  I would also enjoy it very much if you left a comment of any kind.  Thanks and happy reading!

Getting to Me

I swear!  Honest to God!

Is this not the cutest thing ever? 

What does it take to establish perspective?  The life I have, the footprint I have left, the things that will happen tomorrow that are good, the things that happened yesterday and today that are good.  (Not this frigging virus)  And I let some stranger, probably some 52 year old virgin with greasy hair living in an apartment with two cats and a litter box that needs to be changed a week ago, get to me.  Actually make that hot buzzing  behind the forehead  "symptom" of being in "trouble"  happen to me.  Actually give that poor disenfranchised  person POWER to evoke a feeling in me?  In ME?  What the fuck is wrong with me?

I am so pissed.  So very pissed.  Almost pissed enough to make that hot buzzing stop.  It is actually growing more faint as I continue to vent by causing  electronically positioned symbols to appear on a plastic screen.   Which is what I currently list WAY too high on the list of things that I consider to be my legacy.

Instead of that cute little critter on the boppy that contains my DNA. On a quilt that I made, by the way, in the house that belongs to my daughter which is a wonderful house, and a wonderful daughter that contains my DNA.

So fuck you musty lady.  Blackball me.  Smear my reputation all over Amazon with your chintzy greasy keyboard. You don't suck.  You wish you had something to suck.

NICE ! ! and not so. . .

I had my first UK sale.  This is very pleasing news for me. 

In other news, a blog I used to visit a lot, but only drop in on occasionally of late, went on and on today about a book the agency (whose blog it was that I was then gracing with my presence) LOVED and accepted joyfully and couldn't sell.  The blog author, (you can't even say 'he' or 'she' anymore or some snarkiness will show up on their site about it) was dismayed.  The agency "finally" sold this amazing story that was difficult to sell because it crossed genres.  Yup.  It was vampires, zombies, love, ghosts, paranormal stuff, probably a little Steam Punk and a Celtic God or two, along with  an amazing character study of this person that was not able to fit into any of these sub categories of living beings in the unusual world in which she was trying to survive. 

Remember when coming of age stories were about people you might sit next to in study hall?  Like S. E. Hinton's Outsiders, That Was Then, This Is Now?  I seriously wonder what all these books aimed at young adults are contributing to the person's character who happens to be reading them.  Like that Twilight series. Hotcakesl  Couldn't print them fast enough.  T-shirts.  Movies.  And there is not one person who will argue the fact that Bella was a 'Mary Sue' (google) the absolute antithesis of what a young woman in this day and age needs to emulate in her adulthood.  (This from a person who just published a book that discusses putting on a banana flavored condom with your mouth.)  Maybe I am just bitter.  Not so much anymore!  I have already earned more money in my writing 'career' than a certain MFA I know. And we are talking mere weeks into it. 


And even I throw in a Celtic God or two.

THRILL

Well, you can think you are as cynical as would be possible.  But the excitement of that touchdown Saturday was so amazing.  They should study what  that does in your bloodstream.  I would buy some.

And then, today, after working on it for at least five hours, I got my Book up on Smashwords which is a gateway to every electronic reading device.  Anywhere.  I guess the reason I am so happy about it is that is was so much more work than the Kindle deal.  Picky, picky, picky.  It is still telling me I have things to fix, like text inside a table, and there are NO tables in this book.  At least not the kind they mean.  Anyway, it feels so good. Now for Lawmen.  He is getting impatient.  And that is not good.

BUSINESS

My experience with Kindle went very well.  There is only one format problem where I tried to insert a line from a poem.  I will fix that when I am a little more sure of my niche.  One commentor said add more tags and I did that and it went back to review.  So that takes it out of availability for 24 hours. 

I want to put it on Smashwords which supposedly exposes you to more sites.  But their instructions are long.  I think I understand them but have to pick a time when my hands are not shaking because of six other things going on, like trying to get the storm damage fixed, the cars fixed, the couch out of the basement, the microwave hung up, the dog groomed, etc.

The feedback I've gotten is so positive that I feel I can make something of this if I follow the hints of the other self-publishers. 

Anyone who has anything to say about Smashwords, please comment here.